I guess since its been months I haven't talked, I would post.
And after reading 6 Billion Secrets for hours....There's a lot of confessing this Christmas.
Truth is, I hate my life. I hate the woman I have become.
When I was younger I couldn't fathom the idea of cutting...of bulimia or anorexia
I loved everyone. I always smiled and laughed. I was that little girl so full of life.
Now? I look in a mirror every day and hate what I see. I want to starve myself. I want to die. I still have the urges to cut my wrists. Especially when I fight with someone.
I realized I genuinely have become anti social.
I don't deal well with anyone. I cry every night because I wish I was the person I thought I'd be. Not the failure who looks in the mirror and wishes I could cut away the weight, cut away the misery.
No one sees how miserable I am. I wish every night that I wouldn't wake up. That I would remember why I forced myself to quit cutting. I start to remember then the yelling and fighting start.
Truth is I don't know who I am. I have become so unsure about everything.
I always feel self conscious when the topic of depression, bipolar disorder, or cutting come up.
I keep wondering if anyone will recognize any symptoms in me.
I haven't found a medicine that helps. Honestly I stopped taking my medication.
I can't see a difference. Every day is a nightmare.
My sister told me one day she hated me and wished I would die....I almost told her I wish the same thing.
I don't want her to become me.
She wants to be just like me.
How can she want to be the girl who cried all through 7th and 8th grade and high school?
How can she want to be the "fat smart girl" who no one gave a second glance?
Why would she want to be the girl who scarred herself up, just to feel alive?
I don't expect pity. I needed to confess all this.
Sunday, December 25, 2011
Thursday, November 3, 2011
Sad night..
So...earlier I was looking around the living room and found a pocket knife that belonged to my Dad's dad (Papa)... Papa died when I was really little, like 5, from I think they said a heart attack and he crashed... He was the first real person in my family that I was close to who died.....He used to babysit me and the only memories I have of him are us playing with this little pink ball of mine, us eating butter pecan ice cream, and his blue truck... He was so amazing and it completely shell shocked me to find out he died...
And a few years later, his mother, (Gram, my great grandmother) died... She basically raised my Dad when he was little cause his mom didn't want him back then...and when my mom was working, dad would leave me with Gram to go get drunk, cause he was a spoiled punk back then...So she in a way raised me too... All I remember about her was where she lived, us playing with old wrestling dolls and my stuffed animals, and how she had one of those spinny dial phones I used to play with... I loved her so much...
Then it was my Aunt Angie... She was my best friend....we always always went to the Disney movie premieres together and we were identical...Everyone says that I look just like her and act and talk like her too... She was so amazing.... When my dad told me she died....I think I really went into shock... I told my momma and she thought I was lying... She had gastric bypass surgery and they dropped her when she was leaving and threw a clot... it was 9 years ago she died, and on her anniversary I had a complete breakdown cause mom was telling someone what happened to her and it completely broke me down.. I hate having her gone...It hurts....
And then Nana (My dad's mom)...we had a hard time getting to know each other cause she and dad fought a lot...but I used to always stay the night with her and we would be so silly... And she got really sick...It was my sophomore year and she was almost in a coma...and I made myself go to school just so I could be away from my cousins who didn't care and all these strangers and distant family hugging me saying they were sorry...and mom picked me up and...she was gone... I almost ruined a pillow crying.... We got the furniture from her old house and I still hate sitting in that chair I sat in at her house after she died...It just hits me...I couldn't go back and see her after she died...it hurt too much...
I hate how many people I've lost...including someone I was best friends with when I was 11... Kelly had leukemia and when I first went to that church she was my first friend... and the last memory I have of her was the last Easter she came to church...all her hair was gone and she was so small...I clipped out her obituary.... I can't take loss very well.... :(
I have a lot of issues but it hurts to realize you've lost all your father's family you even care about...besides my dad and cousins... And Jessie is losing all his family now... His step dad died in September, his great grandfather in October...and his great grandma may be next...I don't know how many more funerals I can take...
And a few years later, his mother, (Gram, my great grandmother) died... She basically raised my Dad when he was little cause his mom didn't want him back then...and when my mom was working, dad would leave me with Gram to go get drunk, cause he was a spoiled punk back then...So she in a way raised me too... All I remember about her was where she lived, us playing with old wrestling dolls and my stuffed animals, and how she had one of those spinny dial phones I used to play with... I loved her so much...
Then it was my Aunt Angie... She was my best friend....we always always went to the Disney movie premieres together and we were identical...Everyone says that I look just like her and act and talk like her too... She was so amazing.... When my dad told me she died....I think I really went into shock... I told my momma and she thought I was lying... She had gastric bypass surgery and they dropped her when she was leaving and threw a clot... it was 9 years ago she died, and on her anniversary I had a complete breakdown cause mom was telling someone what happened to her and it completely broke me down.. I hate having her gone...It hurts....
And then Nana (My dad's mom)...we had a hard time getting to know each other cause she and dad fought a lot...but I used to always stay the night with her and we would be so silly... And she got really sick...It was my sophomore year and she was almost in a coma...and I made myself go to school just so I could be away from my cousins who didn't care and all these strangers and distant family hugging me saying they were sorry...and mom picked me up and...she was gone... I almost ruined a pillow crying.... We got the furniture from her old house and I still hate sitting in that chair I sat in at her house after she died...It just hits me...I couldn't go back and see her after she died...it hurt too much...
I hate how many people I've lost...including someone I was best friends with when I was 11... Kelly had leukemia and when I first went to that church she was my first friend... and the last memory I have of her was the last Easter she came to church...all her hair was gone and she was so small...I clipped out her obituary.... I can't take loss very well.... :(
I have a lot of issues but it hurts to realize you've lost all your father's family you even care about...besides my dad and cousins... And Jessie is losing all his family now... His step dad died in September, his great grandfather in October...and his great grandma may be next...I don't know how many more funerals I can take...
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
Gah....Idiot people
Ok so the one subject I hold close is cutting. I have been there, hell I'm still there. 6 years of it. And people don't understand things and they run their mouth.
Like not even a couple hours ago, a friend of mine, whom I love, admitted she cut herself. Posted a picture and everything. People started calling her crazy and stupid and going off on her because of it. Said it doesn't help anything, that its all in her head. First my mom said something and 2 idiots decided they could try and act smarter than her. Then I stepped in. I don't think I have ever had to hold back so much. I was her, I know what she means when she says it helps and she does it when she feels alone. So this one tried to pull that "It can hurt the nervous system and kill them" And I had to throw out that most people who do this don't do it to kill themselves or seriously damage themselves. I don't play nice with something this important to me. I almost killed people. No one hurts my friend like they did. She even admitted what they were saying hurt her and made it worse. NO one I told belittled me and treated me like those people were treating my friend. They supported me and genuinely cared and tried to help me.
Here is how I put it to all my lovely facebook friends:
Like not even a couple hours ago, a friend of mine, whom I love, admitted she cut herself. Posted a picture and everything. People started calling her crazy and stupid and going off on her because of it. Said it doesn't help anything, that its all in her head. First my mom said something and 2 idiots decided they could try and act smarter than her. Then I stepped in. I don't think I have ever had to hold back so much. I was her, I know what she means when she says it helps and she does it when she feels alone. So this one tried to pull that "It can hurt the nervous system and kill them" And I had to throw out that most people who do this don't do it to kill themselves or seriously damage themselves. I don't play nice with something this important to me. I almost killed people. No one hurts my friend like they did. She even admitted what they were saying hurt her and made it worse. NO one I told belittled me and treated me like those people were treating my friend. They supported me and genuinely cared and tried to help me.
Here is how I put it to all my lovely facebook friends:
Monday, October 31, 2011
I just feel sad
I realized today I have no social life anymore. I'm always doing my homework, in class, catching up on work I haven't finished, babysitting, or puppysitting, I haven't seen any of my friends outside of class since school began, (3 months), I haven't seen Jessie in 2 weeks at all cause I'm sick, he's sick, family plans, or classwork. I have the worst immune system, if someone anywhere near me has the flu, I end up getting it, I have had a very sore ear infection for WEEKS >.< Winter causes me to just catch anything and everything. I wanna bubble, like in Bubble Boy...Like this:
Seeeeee no germs could get me! :D Eh I'm kinda kooky tonight. I got in a fight again with dad, Jessie is out of cell service for the night, and I am planning to watch Grease for extra credit :P I love that movie.
So Dad has been insufferable the past few days. The other day he and momma got into it over my sister. My sister told my mom that Mom was ungrateful and a horrible mother because Mom wouldn't buy her heels. My sister is 7! She doesn't need heels. Dad just got pissed mom even told him and he yelled at her...It was ugly. Today he started in on me and told me I needed to take something for my attitude. Dude I am bipolar and depressed, I am ON something for my attitude.
Sooooo I want to ramble but I don't know what to ramble about...Oh hey the band t.A.T.u! They're Russian and I love their voices! Course they are kinda done now, they were from the 90s....but still! They sung about being lesbians, and supposedly no one knew if they were or not. Still I got 3 songs by them and one is in full Russian "Ya Soshla Y Uma" It is so amazing :D The English version is called "All the Things She Said" I love it!! And this other group I got hooked on, Meg & Dia. I have strange musical tastes, but hey at least it means no one really knows what to expect. :) I have crazy music on my iPod, I like having bands and singers not many people listen to, It feels like its 'my' band. Maybe its just cause I like feeling like my own person, not one of those radio stalkers :p, but seriously if I do a shuffle of my music it'll be so weird...see:
1. Easier to Run-Linkin Park
2. God Bless the Child- Shania Twain
3. Crazy Little thing Called Love- Rihanna feat. J. Status
4. Moment by Aiden
5. Heart Like a Wheel- The Corrs
6. Forgotten- Avril Lavigne
7. My Last Breath-Evanescence
8. Lollipop Remix- Framing Hanley <3333
9. Stereo Love- Edward Maya
10. Young Forever- The Ready Set <3333333
I have some old Backstreet Boys, Britney Spears, Nirvana, George Strait, Jesse McCartney, plus cover songs, and some unkown bands as well as some well known :) Its just me
... I am so ready for some social time with people... I feel like a hermit. I barely leave my house cause of chores and homework...Oh hey...I just said that... :p So here are some random lyrics :D
"All those crazy things you said, you left them running through my head, you're always there, you're everywhere, but right now I wish you were here. All those crazy things we did, didn't think about it, just went with it, you're always there, you're everywhere, but right now I wish you were here. Damn, damn, damn, what I'd do to have you here, here, here (I wish you were here) damn, damn, damn what I'd do to have you near, near, near (I wish you were here) Avril Lavigne, I Wish You Were Here
Ok lol I'll stop rambling now and lay down and listen to my laptop till I fall asleep xD I miss my Jessie though >.< OMG I want to show you my favorite ring EVER :D Gemvara.com. Its a black diamond, white gold ring, in the "Carrie style"
Isn't she beautiful <3 I can't wait to see the Black Diamond Jessie got me :) but for real, I adore this ring. OK BED FOR REAL!!! xD
So Dad has been insufferable the past few days. The other day he and momma got into it over my sister. My sister told my mom that Mom was ungrateful and a horrible mother because Mom wouldn't buy her heels. My sister is 7! She doesn't need heels. Dad just got pissed mom even told him and he yelled at her...It was ugly. Today he started in on me and told me I needed to take something for my attitude. Dude I am bipolar and depressed, I am ON something for my attitude.
Sooooo I want to ramble but I don't know what to ramble about...Oh hey the band t.A.T.u! They're Russian and I love their voices! Course they are kinda done now, they were from the 90s....but still! They sung about being lesbians, and supposedly no one knew if they were or not. Still I got 3 songs by them and one is in full Russian "Ya Soshla Y Uma" It is so amazing :D The English version is called "All the Things She Said" I love it!! And this other group I got hooked on, Meg & Dia. I have strange musical tastes, but hey at least it means no one really knows what to expect. :) I have crazy music on my iPod, I like having bands and singers not many people listen to, It feels like its 'my' band. Maybe its just cause I like feeling like my own person, not one of those radio stalkers :p, but seriously if I do a shuffle of my music it'll be so weird...see:
1. Easier to Run-Linkin Park
2. God Bless the Child- Shania Twain
3. Crazy Little thing Called Love- Rihanna feat. J. Status
4. Moment by Aiden
5. Heart Like a Wheel- The Corrs
6. Forgotten- Avril Lavigne
7. My Last Breath-Evanescence
8. Lollipop Remix- Framing Hanley <3333
9. Stereo Love- Edward Maya
10. Young Forever- The Ready Set <3333333
I have some old Backstreet Boys, Britney Spears, Nirvana, George Strait, Jesse McCartney, plus cover songs, and some unkown bands as well as some well known :) Its just me
... I am so ready for some social time with people... I feel like a hermit. I barely leave my house cause of chores and homework...Oh hey...I just said that... :p So here are some random lyrics :D
"Know all about, about your reputation. And now its bout to be a havoc situation..." LeAnn Rimes, The Right Kind of Wrong. :)
"It ain't easy livin free..." ACDC, Highway to Hell :P
"Monster, how shall I feel, Creatures lie here, looking through the window." Meg & Dia, Monster <3
"All those crazy things you said, you left them running through my head, you're always there, you're everywhere, but right now I wish you were here. All those crazy things we did, didn't think about it, just went with it, you're always there, you're everywhere, but right now I wish you were here. Damn, damn, damn, what I'd do to have you here, here, here (I wish you were here) damn, damn, damn what I'd do to have you near, near, near (I wish you were here) Avril Lavigne, I Wish You Were Here
Ok lol I'll stop rambling now and lay down and listen to my laptop till I fall asleep xD I miss my Jessie though >.< OMG I want to show you my favorite ring EVER :D Gemvara.com. Its a black diamond, white gold ring, in the "Carrie style"
Sunday, October 30, 2011
Today's rant :P
I really need to go off >.<
So this same girl who was obsessed with this guy for like ever last year, tried to go after Jessie and everything else is now engaged to some dude who she is “so in love with” and shes like a sophomore >:/ REALLY! Who does this shit!
When I met her she was obsessed with Dev, who had a girlfriend at that time. He eventually broke up with her for Kendra (The girl I am ranting about) and not long after they start dating they are engaged and sleeping together. Had this huge life planned out, everything. Right before school started this year (About 3months ago, mind you) they were broke up. Dev was chasing me like a dog in heat, and Kendra was doing everything in her power to break me and Jessie up. Including telling Jessie I was sexting Dev and telling me Jessie was cheating. Finally she got a new guy, Dev got his new girl last month, and they are both engaged after being together less than 2 months. She put she was engaged tonight and people were saying they were still in high school and they still had time. I about put “Look how that last engagement turned out.” She was saying how good the new boy treats her, better than Dev, and I’m sorry but Dev DOTED on her and adored her! I seriously don’t get this. >:[ I really hate people. They haven’t been together 2 months and they are engaged. I’m disgusted…
OH! Good news Jessie said he got me a black diamond ring :D I love love love black diamonds :DD yay. I hopefully get to see him Wednesday before class. Omg :) I is excited <3 I want my ring lol :) soooooo yeah my baby cousin was supposed to come up here with her family buuuut her dad was sick :( shes so cute and I want her.
I dyed my hair black too :D I love it. Halloween is tomorrow, my sister is going as batgirl, my dad’s dog is a ladybug, and the boy pup is a cow xD Gotta love a night when everyone is dressed crazy. Besides my parents and I, that is.
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Has anyone ever noticed on album covers how differently the men and women are shown?
Like the ladies are shown sooooo provocatively, like "Look at me you know you want me." but the guys are posed like either standing or sitting there just like they're relaxed and don't care...which on some guys is sexy lol. But seriously. Some women are barely dressed standing back like they're ready for some guy to come and attack them. >:| I think the one female I've noticed who isn't done like that is Avril Lavigne. She is probably my idol :) She doesn't care and will tell how she feels. I respect her more than any celebrity. :) Then its Hayley Williams from Paramore, and Amy Lee from Evanescence. They are fantastic singers and if I was a lesbian, they would be my crushes :) lol They all remind me of each other a little. Amy is so honest and sings about what we need to hear. That she knows she isn't perfect and she has had a hard time too. Hayley is the youngest I think, but she sings those songs that reach out and you just have to respect her. She sings about problems even from a teen perspective, but it's not Taylor Swift, its not all "this boy hurt my/im so in love with this boy" I love Tay but her music is all boys. >:/ And Avril is not afraid to hurt your feelings and tell you to shove off. I love her for it too :)
I can't do teenie bop music anymore. Its all Justin Bieber (or Beaver if you ask my sister) Miley Cyrus and other musical failures. :/ The few I honestly can say I like are ones like Demi Lovato, Miranda Cosgrove, and Selena Gomez. Demi went through some tough stuff, including hurting herself and I respect her whole heartedly for it. Miranda is the first teen star in a LONG time (since like Hilary Duff) who hasn't gotten in trouble or had a scandal. It's nice to see that now.
Ok I think I rambled enough for tonight. :) So until I get a comment, I won't be posting <3
Like the ladies are shown sooooo provocatively, like "Look at me you know you want me." but the guys are posed like either standing or sitting there just like they're relaxed and don't care...which on some guys is sexy lol. But seriously. Some women are barely dressed standing back like they're ready for some guy to come and attack them. >:| I think the one female I've noticed who isn't done like that is Avril Lavigne. She is probably my idol :) She doesn't care and will tell how she feels. I respect her more than any celebrity. :) Then its Hayley Williams from Paramore, and Amy Lee from Evanescence. They are fantastic singers and if I was a lesbian, they would be my crushes :) lol They all remind me of each other a little. Amy is so honest and sings about what we need to hear. That she knows she isn't perfect and she has had a hard time too. Hayley is the youngest I think, but she sings those songs that reach out and you just have to respect her. She sings about problems even from a teen perspective, but it's not Taylor Swift, its not all "this boy hurt my/im so in love with this boy" I love Tay but her music is all boys. >:/ And Avril is not afraid to hurt your feelings and tell you to shove off. I love her for it too :)
I can't do teenie bop music anymore. Its all Justin Bieber (or Beaver if you ask my sister) Miley Cyrus and other musical failures. :/ The few I honestly can say I like are ones like Demi Lovato, Miranda Cosgrove, and Selena Gomez. Demi went through some tough stuff, including hurting herself and I respect her whole heartedly for it. Miranda is the first teen star in a LONG time (since like Hilary Duff) who hasn't gotten in trouble or had a scandal. It's nice to see that now.
Ok I think I rambled enough for tonight. :) So until I get a comment, I won't be posting <3
Days 18-25 I do believe
There probably will be random lyrics through this, Just a fair warning....
Day 18: Favorite place to eat.
Probably Olive Garden. I love Italian.
Fast food: Probably Hardees. Delicious hamburgers, they have cherry coke, heck I love it there :) Best onion rings ever too :D lol
"You should never try to change me. I can be nobody else, and I like the way I am."
Day 19: Something I miss..
I miss innocence. Back when you didn't know what a broken heart was, or what could all go wrong....back when it wasn't so hard to try and live. Everyday now it's fighting, crying, jealousy, its just not fair. I miss being the little girl who never wondered or worried over anything except Pokemon.... It was so simple back then,...
Day 20: Nicknames (:
Depends on who you ask. I've been called a lot lol.
Meg\
Doodlebug (I will never claim this one >:|)
Doomer (Grandmothers lol)
Megz
Meggie
Ninja Penguin
Megaroo
Loser :)
Buddy
and some profanity lol
I love how everyone calls me something different. :)
Day 21: And My fave pic of myself?
Its the one I put up of me and Jessie in an earlier blog. We looked so happy and I don't know It was just a good memory :)
Day 22: Whats in my purse?
Wallet with reciepts and pictures, IDs, and a couple dollars. Deodorant, Body spray and lotion, pens and other small school supplies, and my box cutter. :) lol I am not crazy. I live in a crazy town and if its either them or me, I got an advantage :D
Day 23: Dude I did my favorite movie(s) Forget this. Skip :P
Day 24:Something I have learned
I learned I have some of the worst trust issues in the world. On here I can be honest and not so afraid. But in this town, everyone looks out for #1. If they want something or someone, they will tear apart anyone in their way to get it. I had a girl lie about me and to me just to try and get Jessie...my family seems to bee self-serving pigs...I barely trust anyone in my life now...I am so scared of getting hurt :/
Day 25: iTunes :D
1. The Only One- Evanescence (LISTEN TO THIS BAND!!! ESPECIALLY TOURNIQUET AND MY IMMORTAL)
2. Good Girl Gone Bad- Rihanna <3 I love her voice
3. Come a Little Closer- Dierks Bentley (He is so awesome)
4. Melt the Sugar- The Summer Obsession
5. Got Me Down- Nina Gordon (THIS IS SO OLD, but awesome)
6. What You See is What You Get-Britney Spears (Old Brit <3)
7. Be Good to Me- Ashley Tisdale :)
8. One Love- Aiden (:D I love this song <3)
9. Quitter-Carrie Underwood (Idk lol)
10. Hell is for Children- Pat Benetar (So sad but so amazing.)
Day 18: Favorite place to eat.
Probably Olive Garden. I love Italian.
Fast food: Probably Hardees. Delicious hamburgers, they have cherry coke, heck I love it there :) Best onion rings ever too :D lol
"You should never try to change me. I can be nobody else, and I like the way I am."
Day 19: Something I miss..
I miss innocence. Back when you didn't know what a broken heart was, or what could all go wrong....back when it wasn't so hard to try and live. Everyday now it's fighting, crying, jealousy, its just not fair. I miss being the little girl who never wondered or worried over anything except Pokemon.... It was so simple back then,...
Day 20: Nicknames (:
Depends on who you ask. I've been called a lot lol.
Meg\
Doodlebug (I will never claim this one >:|)
Doomer (Grandmothers lol)
Megz
Meggie
Ninja Penguin
Megaroo
Loser :)
Buddy
and some profanity lol
I love how everyone calls me something different. :)
Day 21: And My fave pic of myself?
Its the one I put up of me and Jessie in an earlier blog. We looked so happy and I don't know It was just a good memory :)
Day 22: Whats in my purse?
Wallet with reciepts and pictures, IDs, and a couple dollars. Deodorant, Body spray and lotion, pens and other small school supplies, and my box cutter. :) lol I am not crazy. I live in a crazy town and if its either them or me, I got an advantage :D
Day 23: Dude I did my favorite movie(s) Forget this. Skip :P
Day 24:Something I have learned
I learned I have some of the worst trust issues in the world. On here I can be honest and not so afraid. But in this town, everyone looks out for #1. If they want something or someone, they will tear apart anyone in their way to get it. I had a girl lie about me and to me just to try and get Jessie...my family seems to bee self-serving pigs...I barely trust anyone in my life now...I am so scared of getting hurt :/
Day 25: iTunes :D
1. The Only One- Evanescence (LISTEN TO THIS BAND!!! ESPECIALLY TOURNIQUET AND MY IMMORTAL)
2. Good Girl Gone Bad- Rihanna <3 I love her voice
3. Come a Little Closer- Dierks Bentley (He is so awesome)
4. Melt the Sugar- The Summer Obsession
5. Got Me Down- Nina Gordon (THIS IS SO OLD, but awesome)
6. What You See is What You Get-Britney Spears (Old Brit <3)
7. Be Good to Me- Ashley Tisdale :)
8. One Love- Aiden (:D I love this song <3)
9. Quitter-Carrie Underwood (Idk lol)
10. Hell is for Children- Pat Benetar (So sad but so amazing.)
Thursday, October 20, 2011
I gotta rant
Has anyone noticed nowadays every time 2 people begin dating, they automatically are "So in love" yet they break up not a week or 3 later and then those two people are in love with two others.
Love is a powerful word. You shouldn't just say it when you date a person. I said I love you" to only 2 people I dated. One was a stupid long distance thing, but we were together 3 months. So I mean it wasn't like I went from that person to another and said I love you. I mean it when I say 'I love you'. So I do have an emotional attachment to a person. I tell CLOSE friends, family, and Jessie that. I understand saying 'I love you' to a friend and not meaning it the way couples nowadays do. But you don't tell a guy you JUST started dating, barely know, and you definitely don't say it to the next guy you date the same day you date them. Its disgusting.
Maybe I'm old fashioned but when I say it....I mean it. I don't say it to everyone I so much as look at. Its special. Just like losing your v-card. You don't just go for the first guy who goes for your zipper. You are supposed to wait. I waited until I found the guy I was sure about, and even then it still scared me. I mean, I know now its ok, but then I was a wreck. But everyone is sleeping with everyone and I am so sick of it! I mean really....
And now kids are engaged at 14 and 15 to guys they have been with a few months. Seriously they are in high school. Most of those 'romances' end before either graduate. And ugh....I just am so disgusted with all of this......
And don't get me started on freaking drugs. My mini me, Mimi, has been getting stoned almost constantly. She got caught smoking pot on the bus from competition and just barely got away with it, yet she still is always stoned. I am so protective of her (shes like 15) and I went "Momma Bear" on her and she knows I don't lose my temper often, but that was enough crap to deal with.
So yeah I have very strong opinions....if anyone wants to hear a rant on gays (Pro gays btw) just ask lol I got enough ammo to go for days on that :) buuuut I think I went off enough for a little while
Love is a powerful word. You shouldn't just say it when you date a person. I said I love you" to only 2 people I dated. One was a stupid long distance thing, but we were together 3 months. So I mean it wasn't like I went from that person to another and said I love you. I mean it when I say 'I love you'. So I do have an emotional attachment to a person. I tell CLOSE friends, family, and Jessie that. I understand saying 'I love you' to a friend and not meaning it the way couples nowadays do. But you don't tell a guy you JUST started dating, barely know, and you definitely don't say it to the next guy you date the same day you date them. Its disgusting.
Maybe I'm old fashioned but when I say it....I mean it. I don't say it to everyone I so much as look at. Its special. Just like losing your v-card. You don't just go for the first guy who goes for your zipper. You are supposed to wait. I waited until I found the guy I was sure about, and even then it still scared me. I mean, I know now its ok, but then I was a wreck. But everyone is sleeping with everyone and I am so sick of it! I mean really....
And now kids are engaged at 14 and 15 to guys they have been with a few months. Seriously they are in high school. Most of those 'romances' end before either graduate. And ugh....I just am so disgusted with all of this......
And don't get me started on freaking drugs. My mini me, Mimi, has been getting stoned almost constantly. She got caught smoking pot on the bus from competition and just barely got away with it, yet she still is always stoned. I am so protective of her (shes like 15) and I went "Momma Bear" on her and she knows I don't lose my temper often, but that was enough crap to deal with.
So yeah I have very strong opinions....if anyone wants to hear a rant on gays (Pro gays btw) just ask lol I got enough ammo to go for days on that :) buuuut I think I went off enough for a little while
Gah! College is ruining my blog time Days 11-17
Day..... *checks* 11:
Favorite tv shows....I love me some dancing shows. Especially the male professionals. That is some shmexxi stuff whoo lol. Poor Jessie. I do this all the time xD
The show Chuck. So amazing <3
Uhmmm any sorta crime or murder show. I love watching weird stuff lol I am such a nerd
Day 12:
Something I don't leave the house without? My phone. This thing is my life <3 lol I have EVERYTHING on it lol gotta love my electronic dependency. :p And Usually my 5 year old ipod is with me too. I plan to get the iPod classic (40,000 songs nook :D) for my Christmas :) I got so much music lol Omg old Jesse MCCartney. So adorable and Gah!! :) lol I am having Cherry Coke withdrawal I ran out yesterday SO now I have Cherry Dr. Pepper. >:|
Day 13:
Goals... I want to get married and have babies <3 main goal, besides passing my college classes and figuring out a career. But I want to live somewhere either WAY out in the country, or in a big city. I don't like my small town. Everyone is too nosy. Ick lol I hate having strangers in my life. :p
Day 14
Uhm I can't find any pics of me on my laptop...oh wait theres one >.< sigh.... Well outwardly, my hair came back :D lol and....thats all I see :/ but inwardly I grew up. A lot. I don't take crap anymore, I know who I want in my life and who I don't. I know what I believe in and no one will change it. I am me and I am so proud.......dude I look stoned. I hate old pictures >:|
Day 15
Oh hell..... I have personal issues with the Bible. Its close minded and honestly, there is no verse that gets me....So fail.....Uhm..... I guess I can just put a quote that I like...yeah good idea.
Lil Wayne- "Love me or hate me, I promise it won't make me or break me"
Story of my life right thurr
Day....16? Gosh I am so far BEHIND
Dream house? Crap I never thought that far ahead. I just want a place I can raise a good family and have animals. :) I kinda fail at this xD
Day 17
Looking forward to.....uhm I dunno. I'm kinda just goin day by day. I love relaxing and such
And I think I give up for tonight Jeeze I made it from 11 to 17 so I think I did good lol I can continue later xD like while I make up a 3 page paper for my psych class >.<
Favorite tv shows....I love me some dancing shows. Especially the male professionals. That is some shmexxi stuff whoo lol. Poor Jessie. I do this all the time xD
The show Chuck. So amazing <3
Uhmmm any sorta crime or murder show. I love watching weird stuff lol I am such a nerd
Day 12:
Something I don't leave the house without? My phone. This thing is my life <3 lol I have EVERYTHING on it lol gotta love my electronic dependency. :p And Usually my 5 year old ipod is with me too. I plan to get the iPod classic (40,000 songs nook :D) for my Christmas :) I got so much music lol Omg old Jesse MCCartney. So adorable and Gah!! :) lol I am having Cherry Coke withdrawal I ran out yesterday SO now I have Cherry Dr. Pepper. >:|
Day 13:
Goals... I want to get married and have babies <3 main goal, besides passing my college classes and figuring out a career. But I want to live somewhere either WAY out in the country, or in a big city. I don't like my small town. Everyone is too nosy. Ick lol I hate having strangers in my life. :p
Day 14
Uhm I can't find any pics of me on my laptop...oh wait theres one >.< sigh.... Well outwardly, my hair came back :D lol and....thats all I see :/ but inwardly I grew up. A lot. I don't take crap anymore, I know who I want in my life and who I don't. I know what I believe in and no one will change it. I am me and I am so proud.......dude I look stoned. I hate old pictures >:|
Day 15
Oh hell..... I have personal issues with the Bible. Its close minded and honestly, there is no verse that gets me....So fail.....Uhm..... I guess I can just put a quote that I like...yeah good idea.
Lil Wayne- "Love me or hate me, I promise it won't make me or break me"
Story of my life right thurr
Day....16? Gosh I am so far BEHIND
Dream house? Crap I never thought that far ahead. I just want a place I can raise a good family and have animals. :) I kinda fail at this xD
Day 17
Looking forward to.....uhm I dunno. I'm kinda just goin day by day. I love relaxing and such
And I think I give up for tonight Jeeze I made it from 11 to 17 so I think I did good lol I can continue later xD like while I make up a 3 page paper for my psych class >.<
Sunday, October 16, 2011
Dang I am behind
I'm supposed to be on day 12.....lol I am trying to catch up but good grief xD I am trying.......
So I am totally changing my major. I love psychology, but I adore working with children. I want some so bad but if I'm not readyt to yet thanks to college, so I'm going for childcare :D I love working with kids they are the cutest little things EVER :) Only the littler ones, the bigger ones get so mean :/
I love babies :3 my cousin Maycie is like almost 3 months old and I fell in love with her <3 I love working with babies and watching the cute things <33 So yeah I can't wait :) I hope my classes will let me work with children quickly. :D
So I am totally changing my major. I love psychology, but I adore working with children. I want some so bad but if I'm not readyt to yet thanks to college, so I'm going for childcare :D I love working with kids they are the cutest little things EVER :) Only the littler ones, the bigger ones get so mean :/
I love babies :3 my cousin Maycie is like almost 3 months old and I fell in love with her <3 I love working with babies and watching the cute things <33 So yeah I can't wait :) I hope my classes will let me work with children quickly. :D
Saturday, October 15, 2011
Day 10. :p
Ahhhhhh my fears. where to begin....
SPIDERS!!!!!!!!!! I am terrified of these creepy little monsters
Clowns....ugh so gross and *shudder*
Snakes.....I will never like them
Yuck those are worst ones for me.... Spiders especially. I love heights, I love animals, but the second a spider pops up, its alllllll over
Jessie mocks me cause on Halloween I wig out like bad. So this is the worst time of the year for me.
SPIDERS!!!!!!!!!! I am terrified of these creepy little monsters
Clowns....ugh so gross and *shudder*
Snakes.....I will never like them
Yuck those are worst ones for me.... Spiders especially. I love heights, I love animals, but the second a spider pops up, its alllllll over
Jessie mocks me cause on Halloween I wig out like bad. So this is the worst time of the year for me.
Day 9...whooooo xD
The Top one is me and Rachel :), been best friends since like 2008 maybe. So long lol yikes xD
I have a lot more but not enough pictures....but heres one more, me and my boo <3
Day 8 of this lol
Place I have been.....wow this is what I get for not traveling...Georgia would probably be my favorite. It's so beautiful and interesting down there. I love the woods and the cities too. I wouldn't live there but I would kill to visit every once in a while....
You know if I could live anywhere, I would love love love to be somewhere like Kentucky. I love horses, I love watching them run and everything... It is so beautiful and rolling hills and Gah I love it!
Yay more blogs to go
You know if I could live anywhere, I would love love love to be somewhere like Kentucky. I love horses, I love watching them run and everything... It is so beautiful and rolling hills and Gah I love it!
Yay more blogs to go
I am 4 days behind
So it's been insane here lately. I have to catch up with my blogging. >.< I found out when me and Jessie get married I will be related to guy I was super close with and also to my nersty ex. Ick.
So I never thought I could hate another human being...then my aunt tried to kill herself in front of her children, woke up from being unconscious and started screaming at her nurse, her soon to be ex husband, then called my parents looking for pity. My dad told her where to stuff it and she started screaming saying that he was going to have problems with me. Seriously? I waited till I was 17 to lose my V-card, I'm engaged, I never did drugs or smoked. She is so stupid. I hate her. I can't forgive her.......
Time to start the 30 day challenges I forgot about
So I never thought I could hate another human being...then my aunt tried to kill herself in front of her children, woke up from being unconscious and started screaming at her nurse, her soon to be ex husband, then called my parents looking for pity. My dad told her where to stuff it and she started screaming saying that he was going to have problems with me. Seriously? I waited till I was 17 to lose my V-card, I'm engaged, I never did drugs or smoked. She is so stupid. I hate her. I can't forgive her.......
Time to start the 30 day challenges I forgot about
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Day 7 :p
Favorite movies..... this should be fun xD
Cartoon:
Finding Nemo <3 "Just Keep Swimming" :D
Lion King <3 <3 I just can't wait to be king!"
Fox and Hound. So cute <3
Pocahontas. Meeko <3
Mulan. Who couldnt help but love Mooshoo?
Oddly enough, I never liked the princesses. Besides Pocahontas and Mulan. They were bad ass xD
Other types:
The Notebook. Ryan Gosling is SMOKIN'!
Harry Potter, any :D
Dodgeball <3
The Blind Side <3
theres gotta be more, but my brain hurts. I just typed 3 pages :p so I think its take a break time. Cause I got class at 6.... then making up a 3 page psych paper, and a 5-9 minute speech for thursday. yuck
Cartoon:
Finding Nemo <3 "Just Keep Swimming" :D
Lion King <3 <3 I just can't wait to be king!"
Fox and Hound. So cute <3
Pocahontas. Meeko <3
Mulan. Who couldnt help but love Mooshoo?
Oddly enough, I never liked the princesses. Besides Pocahontas and Mulan. They were bad ass xD
Other types:
The Notebook. Ryan Gosling is SMOKIN'!
Harry Potter, any :D
Dodgeball <3
The Blind Side <3
theres gotta be more, but my brain hurts. I just typed 3 pages :p so I think its take a break time. Cause I got class at 6.... then making up a 3 page psych paper, and a 5-9 minute speech for thursday. yuck
Another Day in the life of me :p Day 6 of the 30 day blog challenge
Just realized I have to make it up to day 7 on my 30 day blog challenge. Damn you college >.<
Isn't he pretty <3 this is Patrick Stump from Fall Out Boy He makes me happeh lol <3 I can't help I am stalking him :)
Sunday, October 9, 2011
Why are people so STUPID
Ugh :/ my aunt is such a moron.
She has 2 kids, a freshman in high school and a nine year old little girl. She;s a druggie. Bad. So she's divorcing her husband, and while he was out working, she decided to tell her 9 year old "Goodbye Momma loves you, don't forget that" and over dosed. Before she did this, she texted her husband and told him she was killing herself, he was way out working so he called his mother to go see what was going on. She finds my aunt unresponsive and my cousin crying her eyes out. I have no idea if my other cousin knows what happened, but his mother is in CCU (Critical Care) on a ventilator.
I honestly don't care what happens to her. Its her children. How are they going to take knowing that BITCH tried to kill herself? Her son, I almost guarantee, is using something. The 9 year old....shes acting just like her mom and it worries me. What kind of mother does this in front of her children. She should have NEVER had children. I can't believe her....
She has 2 kids, a freshman in high school and a nine year old little girl. She;s a druggie. Bad. So she's divorcing her husband, and while he was out working, she decided to tell her 9 year old "Goodbye Momma loves you, don't forget that" and over dosed. Before she did this, she texted her husband and told him she was killing herself, he was way out working so he called his mother to go see what was going on. She finds my aunt unresponsive and my cousin crying her eyes out. I have no idea if my other cousin knows what happened, but his mother is in CCU (Critical Care) on a ventilator.
I honestly don't care what happens to her. Its her children. How are they going to take knowing that BITCH tried to kill herself? Her son, I almost guarantee, is using something. The 9 year old....shes acting just like her mom and it worries me. What kind of mother does this in front of her children. She should have NEVER had children. I can't believe her....
30 day blog challenge. Day: 5 :)
Today isnt starting off to be a good day...I'm sick, I was supposed to meet up with my group speech partners, but I don't know if I can now. It's my one year anniversary today as well and I can't see him. Gotta love being grounded....>.< and I just now had my first Cherry Coke. Yech......
Maybe it's a good thing if I don't meet my speech partners....I may kill Kasey or Richard. Richard acts so stupid and makes moronic comments constantly and its so frustrating. :( And Kasey...idk she just frustrates me.
Ok so on to the day 5 post, I can rant and complain after that. Today is a mixture day, for the anniversary my song is "Hate That I Love You" by Rihanna and Ne-Yo. Me and Jess fight constantly and then when I think I can't forgive him, he does something that makes me forget why I was so mad at him. We've always been like this though. We fight then he is so sweet that I just forgive him. Go figure :)
But in general, the song for today seems to be "All These Things I Hate Revolve Around Me" by Bullet For My Valentine. It's so angry and its like they're singing about losing control which with my mood may happen....Music may explain everything about me, from the good, to the bad. blah.
Maybe it's a good thing if I don't meet my speech partners....I may kill Kasey or Richard. Richard acts so stupid and makes moronic comments constantly and its so frustrating. :( And Kasey...idk she just frustrates me.
Ok so on to the day 5 post, I can rant and complain after that. Today is a mixture day, for the anniversary my song is "Hate That I Love You" by Rihanna and Ne-Yo. Me and Jess fight constantly and then when I think I can't forgive him, he does something that makes me forget why I was so mad at him. We've always been like this though. We fight then he is so sweet that I just forgive him. Go figure :)
But in general, the song for today seems to be "All These Things I Hate Revolve Around Me" by Bullet For My Valentine. It's so angry and its like they're singing about losing control which with my mood may happen....Music may explain everything about me, from the good, to the bad. blah.
Saturday, October 8, 2011
30 day blog challenge. Day: 4 :D
So my sister just said she wouldn't insult "my kind" :( I was just called an animal.... what a butt face
Day 4 of the 30 day blog, my parents. Well this should be....awkward
My parents have been married for 18 years. They are as different as night and day. Mom avoids confrontations and its easy for her to hurt someone with words. My dad prefers to use violence -_- which means hes in trouble more than I am. He drives a truck, so he isn't here that much. Poor mom can't escape. We're dysfunctional at best, but we defend each other with our lives. I can mock my family, but if someone else does, I lose my temper. I took a lot after my momma, I know how to hurt someone with words, but I can hit really freaking hard when I get mad
This blog is probably my least favorite....I can't make interesting segments about my parents unless people know them :/
Random question, do mothers who call their son a 'son of a bitch' not realize what they are saying? I think it would be worse to be the actual bitch than to be a son of one....maybe thats just me though....
Day 4 of the 30 day blog, my parents. Well this should be....awkward
My parents have been married for 18 years. They are as different as night and day. Mom avoids confrontations and its easy for her to hurt someone with words. My dad prefers to use violence -_- which means hes in trouble more than I am. He drives a truck, so he isn't here that much. Poor mom can't escape. We're dysfunctional at best, but we defend each other with our lives. I can mock my family, but if someone else does, I lose my temper. I took a lot after my momma, I know how to hurt someone with words, but I can hit really freaking hard when I get mad
This blog is probably my least favorite....I can't make interesting segments about my parents unless people know them :/
Random question, do mothers who call their son a 'son of a bitch' not realize what they are saying? I think it would be worse to be the actual bitch than to be a son of one....maybe thats just me though....
30 day blog challenge. Day: 3
Sorry this was so late. Been catching up on homework and my momma got bit by her dog and we had to try and calm his stupid butt down. Sorry Maddie :( I shall make up for this :)
soooo tonight I'll shall make 2 at least :D
Day 3, my first love.... does this mean teenie bop love when you think you love a guy when you barely knew him, or the real one?
hmmm.....well the teenie bop one looks like a stop sign....Lord what was I thinkin? yucky, well I knew him for years, we grew up together and everything cause our parents were close friends, then we stopped seeing each other and I started realizing I had always liked him, but then in high school.....we were in a ton of classes, and he quit talking to me so oh well his loss :)
Jessie is my first real love. And definitely my last. Met him 2 years ago, cutest thing ever. He wouldn't even talk to me cause he was shy. Now I can't shut him up. And we went from the awkward boy/girl friend only stage, dated, awkwardly might I add, and now here we are. Tomorrow is the official one year anniversary :D soooo excited, though I can't see him till maybe Monday >.< Oh well :)
oh my, my 7 year old sister is singing "Baby Got Back" by Sir Mix Alot....whoa. Only in my house could this happen...
soooo tonight I'll shall make 2 at least :D
Day 3, my first love.... does this mean teenie bop love when you think you love a guy when you barely knew him, or the real one?
hmmm.....well the teenie bop one looks like a stop sign....Lord what was I thinkin? yucky, well I knew him for years, we grew up together and everything cause our parents were close friends, then we stopped seeing each other and I started realizing I had always liked him, but then in high school.....we were in a ton of classes, and he quit talking to me so oh well his loss :)
Jessie is my first real love. And definitely my last. Met him 2 years ago, cutest thing ever. He wouldn't even talk to me cause he was shy. Now I can't shut him up. And we went from the awkward boy/girl friend only stage, dated, awkwardly might I add, and now here we are. Tomorrow is the official one year anniversary :D soooo excited, though I can't see him till maybe Monday >.< Oh well :)
oh my, my 7 year old sister is singing "Baby Got Back" by Sir Mix Alot....whoa. Only in my house could this happen...
Thursday, October 6, 2011
30 day blog challenge. Day: 2 :)
Today is day 2, so the meaning behind my blog name. All the changes and struggles, well It's about all the changes of growing up, leaving my high school and now in college, the struggles of having a significant other in high school, and just that name seems to fit my feelings of the teen years on.
Its been a constant battle to make it where I am, from fighting with depression, suicidal tendencies, and hurting myself to cope. The struggles I went through, and still am, may not be as bad as being abused or drugs and alcohol, but its been a long road to make it here.
I love talking about all this and Maddie, you are officially one of my favorite people. You make me laugh when I check this with your comments. I love reading your blog. Thank you :)
Its been a constant battle to make it where I am, from fighting with depression, suicidal tendencies, and hurting myself to cope. The struggles I went through, and still am, may not be as bad as being abused or drugs and alcohol, but its been a long road to make it here.
I love talking about all this and Maddie, you are officially one of my favorite people. You make me laugh when I check this with your comments. I love reading your blog. Thank you :)
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
This is what happens when I end up bored in class
Ok, since I neither have my laptop, nor anything to do in my computer applications class, random blog time.
I think my printer is haunted. It’s cut on a ton and printed a bunch of papers, with no one touching it or even printing. I’m freaked out. :( Sitting here just trying to get my work finished, and it randomly prints. Disliking my seat now
On a better note, work is done, got me a Cherry Coke and I got the new Script cd, Science and Faith. :D so excited now, and Jessie said he may buy me the Patrick Stump cd when it comes out :D :D so points on the awesome fiancé :)
I swear our classroom is haunted. And falling apart. Computers aren’t working, the psycho printer….I fear for my life xD
I am so hyper. This is like my 3rd CC (Cherry Coke). This makes me happy, just saying. Today has been very fun. Minus sneezing. Ick.
The boys in here are morons :/ and on a sad note, the ring Jess got (not the real engagement ring, every ring he’s gotten has been a fake, because you know, high school boys=broke) is turning my poor finger green :( well it’s still pretty, it’s got a purple stone and silvery, I love it. This is probably one of my favorite rings he’s gotten me. My favorite is huge and diamondy, but too small. Fail on that one. He said he got a new one, can’t wait for it :) even if it isn’t real. Its ok, he’s trying. Goodness I’m in college, I don’t have high expectations on jewelry right now.
It’s a tad bit chilly in here, but I’m getting more chit chatty in both here and my composition class. So my teachers now know I can talk. Oddly enough, I don’t think my speech teacher knows I can….how ironic.
SHUT UP YOU MORONIC BOYS…..:/ My IQ is dropping drastically :( Blech….and my Cherry Coke is all gone :( and I know how to do what we’re doing, thanks to Composition 1, so this is really boring. I have done so many citations in my papers, this is pointless.
And back to work on my controversial movie paper….I’m thinking Dogma, from 1999. They poke fun at Catholicism, says the 2 prophets are sex obsessed stoners, and the 13th apostle was kept out cause he was black (Thank you for Chris Rock <3) He makes me smile. I hope this is controversial enough for my class :D I love controversial papers. My last one was about self-harmers (Cutters). Personal experiences right there. Well back to Facebooking, importing my cds to ITunes (Which reminds me, R.I.P Steve Jobs. :[), and watching Dogma.
30 day blog challenge. Day: 1 :)
So day 1, time to introduce myself, a recent picture and 15 interesting facts. This should be fun. :)
My name is Meaghan; I'm 18, a freshman at a community college, majoring in psychology :). I have 3 dogs, a Pyrenees and 2 toy Australian Shepherds (Hey like you Maddie!) :) I uploaded a newer picture of myself yesterday xD
15 facts…..this should be fun
1. I am obsessed with Patrick Stump from Fall Out Boy <3
2. I have been with my fiance for over a year and 6 months unofficially and a year officially.
3. I can argue almost any side of an issue when writing a paper, whether or not I agree with the side I write.
4. I am petrified of spiders and clowns. >.<
5. I used to do color guard (the kids with the flags for those who don’t know) with my high school band.
6. I cannot be ‘just friends’ with an ex.
7. I am addicted to Cherry Coke.
8. I’m the kind of girl who can listen to hours of Linkin Park, My Chemical Romance, Motley Crue, and Guns n Roses, then randomly listen to Taylor Swift, Britney Spears, and Enrique Iglesias.
9. I used to write hours on stuff, but then I get severe writers block. :/
10. I have a Perry the Platypus backpack that I carry to college. And I see nothing wrong with this :)
11. I am obsessed with Celtic culture, Ireland, and Australia.
12. I have always wanted to leave the U.S and live in either Ireland or Australia. ^-^
13. I LOVE penguins. I have a ton of stuffed penguins in my room, kinda like that chick from Good Luck Chuck that Dane Cook’s character falls in love with.
14. I love Pokemon, but hate the newer generation of it.
15. I know almost every line from The Lion King, and random ones from The Blind Side, Finding Nemo, The Notebook, and Dodgeball. <3
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
30 day blog challenge. Day: 0
I totally took this idea from a person I'm following, (TOAR). Every day, for a month I have to do what this list says to do on this day. SO today is day 0, tomorrow is introduction, recent picture, and 15 interesting facts. Oh lord.
Day 0: The 30 Day Challenge Explanation and Description
Day 1: Introduce, recent picture of yourself, 15 interesting facts
Day 2: Meaning behind your blog name
Day 3: Your first love
Day 4: Your parents
Day 5: A song to match your mood
Day 6: A picture of something that makes you happy
Day 7: Favorite movies
Day 8: A place you've traveled to
Day 9: A favorite picture of your best friend
Day 10: Something you're afraid of
Day 11: Favorite tv shows
Day 12: Something you don't leave the house without
Day 13: Goals
Day 14: A picture of you last year - how have you changed?
Day 15: Bible verse
Day 16: Dream house
Day 17: Something you're looking forward to
Day 18: Favorite Place to Eat
Day 19: Something you miss
Day 20: Nicknames
Day 21: Favorite Picture of yourself ALL TIME Why?
Day 22: What's in your purse?
Day 23: Favorite Movie
Day 24: Something you've learned
Day 25: Put your iPod on shuffle, first 10 songs
Day 26: Your Dream Wedding
Day 27: Original Photo of the city you live in
Day 28: Something that stresses you out
Day 29: 3 Wishes
Day 30: a picture of yourself this day and 5 good things that happened since you started the challenge
Day 0: The 30 Day Challenge Explanation and Description
Day 1: Introduce, recent picture of yourself, 15 interesting facts
Day 2: Meaning behind your blog name
Day 3: Your first love
Day 4: Your parents
Day 5: A song to match your mood
Day 6: A picture of something that makes you happy
Day 7: Favorite movies
Day 8: A place you've traveled to
Day 9: A favorite picture of your best friend
Day 10: Something you're afraid of
Day 11: Favorite tv shows
Day 12: Something you don't leave the house without
Day 13: Goals
Day 14: A picture of you last year - how have you changed?
Day 15: Bible verse
Day 16: Dream house
Day 17: Something you're looking forward to
Day 18: Favorite Place to Eat
Day 19: Something you miss
Day 20: Nicknames
Day 21: Favorite Picture of yourself ALL TIME Why?
Day 22: What's in your purse?
Day 23: Favorite Movie
Day 24: Something you've learned
Day 25: Put your iPod on shuffle, first 10 songs
Day 26: Your Dream Wedding
Day 27: Original Photo of the city you live in
Day 28: Something that stresses you out
Day 29: 3 Wishes
Day 30: a picture of yourself this day and 5 good things that happened since you started the challenge
Ranting Time
Why is the female species so STUPID! >=( I have had enough crap from stupid little brats over the past 3 months.
Jessie is still in high school, and since I'm gone, stupid little wannabes are going around saying he's cheating on me, he's the father of their baby and all this other CRAP. I've been very calmly ignoring it, but the next rumor I hear that he's the father of some slut's child, I will be at the high school beating some sense into little idiot girls. I don't play around with crap like this.
And if it's the girl that's been trying to break me and him up for a while now, all the more reason to deal with it.
And in my computer applications class, big mouth boys are making it impossible to learn anything. I have already planned to fling a printer at their heads. >.< I dislike people
Why are people so dumb? I mean really, can't anyone act their age, and treat people with respect. I never did the crap these girls nowadays are doing. Having sex with as many people as possible, dressing like skanks, doing drugs, drinking. I don't get how they think this is 'cool'. And I doubt college admissions people will be wanting those students at their schools. But that's just my opinion. I think virgins should be counted as a minority these days, not that many are left out there.
It would be different if you have sex with a long time boyfriend or fiance, something more binding than 'I like you. Let's hook up' Girls have gotten dumber over the years, and I'm embarrassed to be one.
Jessie is still in high school, and since I'm gone, stupid little wannabes are going around saying he's cheating on me, he's the father of their baby and all this other CRAP. I've been very calmly ignoring it, but the next rumor I hear that he's the father of some slut's child, I will be at the high school beating some sense into little idiot girls. I don't play around with crap like this.
And if it's the girl that's been trying to break me and him up for a while now, all the more reason to deal with it.
And in my computer applications class, big mouth boys are making it impossible to learn anything. I have already planned to fling a printer at their heads. >.< I dislike people
Why are people so dumb? I mean really, can't anyone act their age, and treat people with respect. I never did the crap these girls nowadays are doing. Having sex with as many people as possible, dressing like skanks, doing drugs, drinking. I don't get how they think this is 'cool'. And I doubt college admissions people will be wanting those students at their schools. But that's just my opinion. I think virgins should be counted as a minority these days, not that many are left out there.
It would be different if you have sex with a long time boyfriend or fiance, something more binding than 'I like you. Let's hook up' Girls have gotten dumber over the years, and I'm embarrassed to be one.
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